HS 101

Why Jesus Called Men

APRIL 30, 2015 (ENGLISH)
Bible Text: Matthew 4:19 | Dr. Harold J. Sala
Series: The Guidelines Commentary

NOTES

“Come follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will make you fishers of men.” Matthew 4:19
As the morning light pierced the eastern sky over the little village of Bethsaida at the northern end of Galilee, two brothers arose from their pallets, ate a light breakfast—probably fish and bread—and headed for the boats. We know them as Peter and Andrew, and if this sleepy pair thought, “Another day fishing!”, little did they know how the events of that particular day were going to forever change the direction of their life.

They had no sooner thrown their net into the water when a stranger, dressed in a seamless Galilean robe, walked by. He saw the two brothers and said, “Follow me!” It was both an invitation and a command. They knew that this one who summoned them was an itinerant rabbi who had been visiting synagogues in Galilee and who also stirred up considerable controversy.

But when Jesus called these two, there was an immediate connection, and they walked away from their nets to follow Him. Later that morning Jesus recruited another set of brothers, James and John, from the same village, in all probability acquaintances if not friends of Peter and Andrew.

But what was it that was so compelling? The tone of His voice? His eyes which could reflect the kindness that caused a child to respond or flash fire that caused others to cringe? Was it His compelling personality? Or was there something, perhaps deep in their hearts, that made them ponder the possibility that this was the Messiah who would throw off the tyranny of Rome?

Notice, if you would, that five men are involved in this drama which took place on the shores of Galilee long ago—Jesus, and two sets of brothers: Peter and Andrew, and James and John. In the months that followed, Jesus recruited another eight men to be part of that executive committee, that inner circle of ordinary men, following an extraordinary person. We call them Apostles.

Observe that there was not a woman among them. Does that seem strange? For a few moments focus with me on what makes you either masculine or feminine. About six weeks following conception the hypothalamus gland in your brain kicks into gear and sends signals to your body which says, “Turn the testosterone loose.” “Or open the faucet on estrogen,” and whichever hormone it is makes you completely masculine or feminine.

Scientists in the laboratory have discovered that there are basic differences between the brains of males and females, and it is your brain that determines how you think, and how you think determines how you act. It’s been interesting to note that at the very time feminists have been trying to wipe out sexual differences, scientists have been discovering how different we really are.

Men are aggressive by nature; women are nurturing or compliant. Neither is better than the other, just different. It was God’s purpose for a husband and wife to come together and become one flesh, yet, as Zig Zigler points out, “You can’t have a parade of two cars until you decide which one will lead the parade.”

When men follow in the footsteps of Him who beckoned the four fishermen brothers, women will walk hand in hand with them, side by side, and they won’t have to worry about the next generation. They will follow in their footsteps.

The reality is that the words of Jesus continue to echo through the corridors of time, and He still summons men to follow Him. Why follow Him? Simple! When you follow, you get to know Him, and when you know Him, you will love Him, and when you love Him, you obey him, and that includes leading your family and loving your wife as He loved the church. That’s enough love to satisfy any woman. Think about it.

Resource reading: Matthew 4:18-22

DUX THOUGHTS:

God was not being unfair when He instructed wives to submit to their husbands. God being perfect knew what's best for His creation. We do not need to extra analyze things because life is way better if we simply TRUST and OBEY God.

No one could blame me if would desire for a man after God's own heart. Like king David, perfection is not a requirement to earn God's favor. What David has was a repentant heart and all his victories came forth because he sought to the face of the Lord. On the other hand, all of his defeats were fruits of going ahead of God and disobedience to His commands. 

David and Bathsheba had a bad start, they were involved in an adulterous relationship which even led David to commit murder against Uriah (Bathsheba's husband). David commanded his general Joab to put Uriah on the first line of the defense so that Uriah would be struck and die during the battle. The child born out of that sinful union died. 

Nathan confronted David of his sin and David wholeheartedly repented of his sin.

Notice how the story went on, Bathsheba was the mother of Solomon, the wisest man and king on earth before Christ. This wise KING whose other name is King Lemuel wrote a good account of his mother found in Proverbs 31.

Yes folks, the virtuous wife in proverbs 31 was no other than BATHSHEBA.

When a man who is bound to lead his family has a repentant heart and is devoted in seeking the Lord's face in his decision-makings and desires would most probably produce a good family where wisdom, favor and joy dwell. More so if this godly man is paired to a godly woman.It is not a perfect union but is a blessed union and the most important thing, God is glorified in there relationship.

RESOURCE: 2 Samuel chap 11-12

Acts 13:22

And when He had removed him, He raised up for them David as king, to whom also He gave testimony and said, ‘I have found David the son of Jesse,a man after My own heart, who will do all My will.’

God knows everything. He knew David will fall into sin but He still chose him to lead his people and from whose lineage Jesus will come forth. Despite David's imperfection, God called him to be  A MAN AFTER HIS OWN HEART.

I could relate to David and Bathsheba's journey. 

If i recall it right, it was around July of 2004 that I first attended a midweek bible study at Calvary Chapel Iloilo then it took me almost 2 months before I finally decided to join the Sunday fellowship. Then I regularly show up on prayer meetings and I did not miss the Youth fellowship when the church had one sometime during the 2nd semester. 

Counting it correctly, I was in constant fellowship and fully immersed in bible studies for 7 months before I threw the white towel.Though I heard the truth, I was worshiping Jesus and was being transformed each day of my life then BUT still I took a long time until I finally decided to surrender everything to God!

I sang in my heart that I HAVE DECIDED TO FOLLOW JESUS, NO TURNING BACK, NO TURNING BACK only on the 8th month since I heard the truth. I may be growing in my knowledge of His truth and grace but there must be a point where I should decide with what to do with all that I know. The moment of total commitment to live for him was made on that particular day and that day changed my forever. 

It was more than accepting Christ as my personal Savior but a commitment to spend the rest of my life seeking His will in my life. It was more than enjoying His goodness but sharing it too to others. It was more than receiving His blessings but constantly desiring how to return the favor and put a smile on His face. 

I took 7 long months (February 2005) before I surrendered all and I am glad that I am on the same road even after a decade when I made that lifelong commitment to love the Lord with ALL my heart, mind, soul and strength.

By God's grace, this growing relationship I have with Him will continue to be stronger as time passes by and may all the people I meet along would desire the same.

Bahala na matagal basta magtatagal :-)

JC 101 May 1

April 30

... To feed the church of God ...
Acts 20:28

After shepherding sheep on the backside of the desert, the Lord called Moses to shepherd three million people through the wilderness. On their way to the Promised Land, his authority was questioned time after time. In Numbers 16, we read that Dathan, Abiram, and Korah brought 250 leaders of the nation of Israel to Moses, saying, ‘Who gave you authority to lead us?’

In response to their question, the Lord instructed Aaron to have one leader from each tribe place a rod in the tabernacle along with his. They did so, and the next morning, the rods looked just as they had left them — all except for Aaron’s, which had blossomed.

From whence comes authority in ministry or in your family? From the blossom of fruitfulness.

What is fruit? Galatians 5:22 defines it as love — love which is joy, love which is peace, love which is longsuffering, love which is gentle, good, faithful, meek, and temperate. If we truly love people, we will have authority to give direction to them because they will see the fruitfulness of the Lord’s love blossoming in us.

The story of Moses continues. The years passed and the people began complaining once again saying, ‘We’re out of water, Moses. You’ve brought us out here to die.’ In response to their complaint, the Lord instructed Moses to speak to the rock from which water would flow (Numbers 20:8). Instead of speaking to the rock, however, Moses struck it with the rod, while saying to the people, ‘You rebels. Must we fetch water for you?’

What happened to the rod as he smote the rock?

The blossoms fell off;
the fragrance was diminished;
the fruitfulness
Whenever I beat one of God’s people verbally or in my heart, I’m smiting Christ, the Rock of my salvation, and destroying the fruit of His Spirit in the process. Therefore it is not my job to beat the flock — to analyze, scrutinize, or criticize. It is my job to feed the flock — to encourage, nourish, and love. Certainly feeding includes warning and exhorting — but it does not include beating, bruising, or wounding.

‘Feed the flock,’ said Paul, not, ‘Beat the flock,’ because there has already been One Who was bloodied, bruised, and beaten on our behalf.

They beat His face.
They beat a crown of thorns into His scalp.
They beat Him with rods.
They beat Him with fists.
They beat Him with words.

Therefore, because He was beaten in our place, I must not beat myself or beat others.

Dux' THOUGHTS

Romans 5:20-21

Moreover the law entered that the offense might abound. But where sin abounded, grace abounded much more, so that as sin reigned in death, even so grace might reign through righteousness to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

It is but lovely to know that though we are constantly tempted by sin, it is by His grace that we overcome. Even at times we fall into sin, it is grace that we get restored again.

However, grace is not a license to sin because God is also a just God. The best thing to do is to acknowledge where we fall short, ask for His forgiveness and ask for His spirit to empower us that we will not do it again.

This grace is NOT exclusive between God and us but we must also extend it to others. Were we not called to love our enemies?

happy labor day and consider 1 Peter 4:8 which says,

"And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.”

love is the answer :-)

JC 101

April 29

... And to all the flock ...
Acts 20:28

Take heed to yourself first and then to the flock because if you’re in right relationship with the Lord, blessings will flow through you to the flock of your family, the Sunday school kids you teach, the people to whom you witness.

Towards the end of his life, David was surrounded by a group of men who are recorded as being men who killed giants (2 Samuel 21:15-22). Saul, on the other hand, who had been afraid of Goliath, was surrounded by men who never engaged in battle against a giant. Therein lies an extremely important principle as it relates to ministry: If I want those around me to be giant-killers, I must kill giants myself.

If you’re not worshipping or witnessing, chances are, your family, congregation, and friends won’t worship or witness because, as seen in the lives of David and Saul, what you are is what those around you will become.

I cannot stress too heavily the importance of a secret, personal devotional life. ‘Take heed to yourself and to the flock,’ wrote Paul — not because the priority is to be on self, but because a preparation of self will allow you to see those around you kill giants.

DUX' THOUGHTS

I am convinced that my life is meant to affect people and I desire that my lifestyle points to Christ's goodness and truth. Though I do not believe in special programs to win over people to Jesus, I still join activities where friendship develops and relationship grows. 

Another badminton schedule will not push through today but I hope Lace would be available for a bible study.

I met Lace during Dan's birthday. She is Jo Anne's classmate and presently assigned in the Finance Dept. of RPO12. Dan met Lace in the Instructor's Development Class.

Dan is leaving soon to pursue that Scout Ranger course, it is another see you later episode to a good friend and brother in the Lord. 

Ahem! 

Modifying JC's writing, page 431 of his Commentary. 

When Talkn Text vs Rain or Shine play basketball, people in the stands go crazy. they lift their hands victoriously, clap exuberantly, and cheer wildly. They stand, yell and stomp their feet and they won'd care who sees them. People cry when they see Michael Jackson, they could stand the heat or cold just to see the queen pass by and a student will save all her allowances to watch One Direction's concert. Humanity creatively and radically worships with abandon. But when it comes to worshiping Jesus, arms fold, voices hush, and sitting becomes the position of choice. Our culture finds it very easy to worship sports, movie or rockstars but has great difficulty worshiping Jesus. 

Are you a fan or a follower of Jesus? the difference is the RELATIONSHIP found in being Christ's disciple/follower..

 I am back working on this Homicide case. Sir Joel came by bringing pizza--- oh no! extra calories. Sir! buong puso kong ilalaban itong kaso nato at kaawaan nawa tayo ni Lord na umiral ang katotohan at hustisya. Sana available na soon the documents I need for the paper. Hamakin ang dalwang dangkal pala na docs ay marami pang kulang. 

kaya namin to ni Lord! yeeha!

Jon Courson's Daily devotional

April 28
Take heed therefore unto yourselves and to all the flock ...
Acts 20:28

Notice the order: Take heed to yourself first. Make sure you’re cultivating a personal devotional life; that you’re a man or a woman of prayer. Make sure you’re one who is engaged in consistent communion with the Lord personally.

Abraham was a lover of God. On his way to the Promised Land, wherever he went, he built an altar. As he traveled, because the Lord prospered him more and more, his flocks began to increase. So he dug wells to ensure that his flocks were sufficiently watered.

When Abraham’s son, Isaac came on the scene, seeing his father's expansive flocks, he decided the key to his father’s success was digging wells. So Isaac dug many wells — but he built only one altar. Consequently, his wells were named Sitna and Esik, or ‘Strife’ and ‘Contention’.

When Isaac’s son, Jacob — the third generation from Abraham — appeared, he built no altars and dug no wells. Instead, he said, ‘The key to seeing the flock grow is ingenuity, creativity, and genetic engineering,’ (Genesis 30).

That’s what often happens: A man or woman loves God and from that love, there’s an overflow whereby the flock grows. Then the second generation says, ‘I too want to be in ministry and see a flock grow’ — so they copy the outward activity of the generation before them — but it only produces tension, strife, and agony. Why? Because they’re not altar builders.

Finally, the third generation comes along and says, ‘Programs — that’s the key. We’ll have excellent entertainment. We’ll have relevant, current messages which, although they aren’t necessarily Biblical, speak to the needs of the people.’ And it’s exciting for awhile, but it’s not sustaining. They have to try harder and harder in their Jacob mentality to keep everything going with creativity and ingenuity.

True ministry begins with an altar-building man or woman loving God and enjoying the Lord. All too often, however, the lover of God is followed by a well-digger — one who wants to see the flock watered, but who has lost the understanding of the altar and a personal, private passion for the Lord. The third generation, the program people, the Jacobs, then come on the scene and say, ‘We’re going to really wow the world with our creativity.’

I see this happening not only in churches, but in my own life as well. Quite frankly, I can go through all three generations in one day. I can start the morning as an altar-builder, a lover of God. Then, sometime around noon, I can become a well-digger saying, ‘Lord, I don’t have time to talk to You. I’ve got to water these sheep.’ As a result, in the evening, I find myself thinking, ‘Oh, no. My ministry’s slipping. I better do something creative and ingenious.’

What happened to Jacob? Finally, this clever heel-snatcher came to the end of his rope when he heard his estranged brother, Esau, was coming with four hundred men to meet him. After Jacob crossed a little creek called Jabok, he wrestled the Angel of the Lord and said, ‘I’m not going to let You go until You bless me,’ (Genesis 32:26). Talk about close contact and a restoration of intimacy! Jacob was no longer striping stakes; he was wrestling with God all night long.

In the morning, the Lord said, ‘Jacob you have prevailed. No longer will you be called Jacob, or, ‘Clever One’. You’ll now be called Israel, which means ‘Governed by God’, because at last you understand it’s staying close to Me; it’s wrestling with Me; it’s depending on Me that matters.’

I’ve seen peoples finally get to the place of being exhausted from ‘Jacob-ing’ it. They get back to the altar, back to saying, ‘Lord, we just want to know You.’ People like that get used by the Lord time after time as they touch people from the overflow of an ‘altared’ life.

DUX' THOUGHTS

I REMEMBER CHUCK SMITH when asked what is his secret that people flock at Calvary,
"SIMPLY TEACH THE WORD SIMPLY", he answered.

Special programs to reach for others are not necessary in Jesus ministry but it is right that we must establish rapport before we could penetrate in because relationship connects the hearts. Whatever is done in love, be it in words or acts, this dying world would not resist.

in the name of justice and truth

My heart is overwhelmed over this case recently referred to our office. It was handled by another lawyer which i think was good but whose efforts and sound legal arguments were left unheeded by the  trial court. This criminal proceeding ran for 15 years where I was only a high school student when it started and I hate to think about the torture it brought to the accused. They were convicted and the higher court affirmed it and denied the subsequent MR. And now, with hopes that we can do something about the case, they came to our office. My boss handed the thick files to me. One week was not enough to read them all and it is but an ambition to organize my thoughts as to how to present them well in a paper within the same period.

I admit that I am troubled now in looking for jurisprudence that will bridge the pleading to the Highest Courts attention without getting dismissed based on plain technicalities. If only, "in the name of justice and truth" would be enough for its accommodation then my mind could rest now.

My eyes are tired browsing one case after another to construct the outline/skeleton of the paper. In tears, i beg God to help me on this,. I just cannot stop or slow down knowing the gravity of the penalty and injustice it will do if not acted favorable by the Highest Court. It will be heartbreaking to send innocent people to jail and affect the future of their families.

May our righteous and just God  give me wisdom in making this paper accomplish His works of justice and truth. Above all, may He deliver these innocent accused from this false accusation and give them comfort while I prepare the paper. Tsk tsk kawawa talaga :-( Lord have mercy on them and on me.

Passion Conference 2014 - Session 1

ALMOST THERE

For a moment I enjoyed playing a compilation of OPM love songs but at one point my thoughts started to wander again that pushed me to switched it off and played Passion Conference instead.  I'll keep feeding my soul and spirit to make my love for Jesus steady and increasing because when I don't I'm swimming again in the ocean of entanglements of the past.

It is really sad that I am still allergic to romantic movies, TV series and love songs. I get rid of them all to pacify my thoughts and my means of forgetting that fondness that is not for me to keep.

Whatever is not Yours oh God, please take it away

Whatever draws a smile on Your face, make me that

Let Your love conquer completely my thoughts and passions

God forgive me whenever I look back and dread the past

It pains me to stay trapped and forget how precious I am before Your eyes

God, allow me not to get consumed by my personal appreciation of the season

Instead, empower me to always see the beauty and joy in You

Let my life reflect and resonate Your goodness in what I desire and do.

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever things are true, whatever things are honest, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

turning 29

TALAMBUHAY

The mother was inflicted with German measles during her pregnancy,

From said disease, the chance of a healthy and normal baby was slim

The worried father suffered ulcer of the possibility of having a physically impaired or mentally retardate daughter.

The long wait and agony were over on the last week of April

Lo and behold, the broiler was born

The parents wondered why she had light complexion when the heated womb should have affected her color.

That baby girl never played Barbie but explored vast grasslands hunting spiders,

Yes, she climbed trees, flipped cards, flew kites and had scars riding bikes.

Active childhood was what she got for growing up with her two brothers.

School has never been that appealing like ice cream to her

To stay in the first section and to pass UPCAT were all she dreamed of after realizing that her height disqualifies her to enter PMA

Over the years, she learned English, Mathematics, Science and all household chores.

At 17, Iloilo city had been her new residence

During college, only then that life truly began for her

Encountering Jesus was encountering one’s first, perfect and lasting love

You call that simple lady,  Dux. 

This is not yet done.... I'm already sleepy..  the best seasons in my timeline are not yet in the poem...

Instead of walking Bub around, I just played with him a bit and went off biking.

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Matthew 11:15 He who has ears to hear, let him hear!

SEEKING THE LOST

by Darlene Sala
April 20, 2015


A professional diver has in his home two halves of an oyster shell with a piece of paper between the halves.

While diving one day on the bottom of the ocean, he noticed an oyster with a piece of paper in its mouth. He detached the oyster and held the piece of paper close to the goggles of his headgear. He found that it was a Gospel tract telling how to become a Christian, and calling on whoever read it to repent of his sins.

The amazed diver said, “I cannot hold out against God any longer, since He has gone to so much trouble to track me down.” At the bottom of the ocean he repented of his sins and placed His faith in Jesus Christ. God used an oyster to change the man’s life.

Zacchaeus was a tax collector who was wealthy because he charged people too much and pocketed the difference. He was in Jericho the day Jesus came, and he wanted to see him. But not having the height advantage of Michael Jordan, he couldn’t see over the crowd. So he ran ahead and climbed a tree. When Jesus reached the spot, he looked up, "Zacchaeus, come down immediately. I must stay at your house today." He welcomed him gladly. The people began to mutter, "He has gone to be the guest of a 'sinner.’” Zacchaeus said…, "Look, Lord! Here and now I give half of my possessions to the poor, and if I have cheated anybody out of anything, I will pay back four times the amount." Jesus said, "Today salvation has come to this house…. For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost" (Luke 19:1-10).

If God is speaking loud and clear to you today, don’t you think it’s time for you to act in response? Whether you are on the bottom of the ocean or in a tree-top or driving your car to work, He sees you and He’s calling you to respond.

NO TO HALVES

There is no way that I would not get affected with the cases I am working on. I treat them as if I am the one who will get imprisoned, would be deprived of a property or begging justice in general. Reading voluminous records sucks out every drop of energy in my veins and my heart is crushed of the lies I perceived from which.

Discernment, that I want in taking a case though most of the time they were just forwarded to me where the initial acceptance is of my boss’ discretion, still I am vigilant in knowing if the truth is on my side because I cannot pour my heart out on something where lies dwell. If I were to fight for a cause, it has to be consistent with my Christian values.

Wisdom, that’s what I beg from God whenever I am drafting legal papers.

Consideration, that’s what I hope from the people surrounding me. Distractions are unwelcome when I think deep and I become somehow insensitive because my world closes in to what I do.

Prayer, that is what my beloved brothers and sisters in the Lord offer me with which I am always extra grateful about.

Call it love

1 Peter 4:8
And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.”

bumabawi kay BUB

Before going to college, the last pet i had was a monkey that i named Eco because of the sound he makes "Kohw" :-) He was very young when delivered to us by our tenant. Eco's mother was shot by some unidentified hunter leaving Eco an orphan. I fed him with baked sweet potato and banana of course but his favorite snack was ice pop. Kahit pet hinahawaan ko ng talent sa pagkain ng ice hehe

While I was away, Eco still get fed but he lost the TLC when I left. I took pity on him that I entrusted his care to someone who has plenty of animals in his house including monkeys so to add Eco in a family. Then I heard the news that Eco died there :-(

Since then I did not have pets until after my review where I thought I already had all the time in the world to have one. Luli gave that cutie pup to me which tito Josh named as Bubbles for vet records. Well, i wanted a one syllable name for my pup and Bubbles is a girl's name that i decided to name him Bub instead :-)

In bringing him to Gensan from Davao, I bought him a doggy diaper which has a hole for the tail and I put him in a box but he was not comfy there that he ended resting in my lap and being hugged most of the time---- with that, we established a special bond. I bathe him almost everyday, spent the day cuddling, playing and did together all that special moments people do with their pets.

When my niece was born, my attention and care for Bub were directed to babysitting. My schedule went more crazy when I started working where I can only manage to go home during weekends. My poor Bub, most of the time, all he gets from me is a quick head massage. I really try to bathe him myself and do walking together. At the end of the month, if my schedule permits, I'll treat him with grooming services.

Dog's offer unlimited hugs but a baby's smile is priceless.

Success and Marriage by Harold Sala

So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12

In their book Leaders, Warren Bennis and Burt Nanus see five skills shared by 90 of the world's most successful businessmen. Whatever these men don't have in common, the authors noted with surprise that almost all of them are deeply committed to the institution of marriage and are still married to their first wife. But the question is, "Do the same factors that make them succeed in business also make them succeed at home?" You can decide for yourself.

Skill #1: The ability to accept people as they are, not as you would like them to be. In a way, this can be seen as the height of wisdom: to 'enter the skin' of someone else, to understand what other people are like on their terms, rather than judging them." The authors didn't say, "hard work," "determination," "whipping your team into shape," rather, getting into the skin of another. Jesus put it, "Whatever you would that men should do unto you, even so do you to them" (Matthew 7:12). In marriage it means accepting your mate as he or she is instead of spending your time trying to whip the other person into line with your concept of what he or she ought to be. Some wives work so hard at making their husbands the man she would like to be married to, they don't have time to be very good wives to their husbands, and vise versa.

Skill #2: The capacity to approach relationships and problems in terms of the present rather than the past. Certainly it is true that we can learn from past mistakes. But using the present as a takeoff point for trying to make fewer mistakes seemed to be more productive for our leaders‑‑and certainly was more psychologically sound than rehashing things that are over. Love in marriage is a fairly recent concept. Romantic love is great! It is important, but forgiveness is as old as the institution of marriage itself. Forgiveness allows us to live in the present rather than nurse bitterness from the past. Vitally important in marriage, just as it is in business, is forgiveness.

Skill #3: The ability to treat those who are close to you with the same courteous attention that you extend to strangers and casual acquaintances. “The need for this skill," say the authors, "is often most obvious‑‑and lacking‑‑in our relationships with our own families. But it is equally important at work. We tend to take for granted those to whom we are closest. Often we get so accustomed to seeing them and hearing from them that we lose our ability to listen to what they are really saying or to appreciate the quality‑‑good or bad‑‑of what they are doing." Self explanatory. Strange, is it not, how we come home, close the door and say things to each other we would never think of saying to our colleagues on the job? Why? Does marriage give you license to hurt the ones you love?

Skill #4: The ability to trust others, even if the risk seems great. Trust is a vital ingredient of love. It means commitment. It involves risk, and when you have been hurt the tendency is to pull back, withdraw, hesitate. You can't do it.

Skill #5: The ability to do without constant approval and recognition from others.Does that skill apply to marriage? I think it does. It doesn't mean that we don't need to communicate love. Rather it means we must have a deep confidence that we are secure in each other because initially we made a commitment to each other and that commitment endures. What makes for success in the business world makes for success in marriage, or, perhaps, it should be what makes for success in marriage, makes for success!

Resource reading: Colossians 3.

MULI

Kumusta mga kaibigan? 

Inaasahan kong kayo'y malusog at masaya 

Pano, yan ang lagi kong dalangin

Asul parin ang kalangitan

Itim ang aking buhok

Walang nagbago tulad ng mga prinsipyo ko 

Natuyo man ang mga damo sa paligid

Agad nagbeberde sa konting ulan

Ganyan din ang pagmamahal ko, ang daling palagu-in

wala ako sa mood tuloy walang coherence

How to Stay Married to a Lawyer by Jeena Cho on April 13th, 2015

What are the challenges that come with marrying a lawyer and maintaining a happy marriage with a lawyer? Are there special rules or considerations when loving a lawyer?
I sat down with two therapists, Laura Freeman and Will Meyerhofer to help me figure this out. Freeman, a clinical psychologist in California, is in a unique position to share her insights and advice because she is married to a lawyer, Brian Freeman. Meyerhofer is a former Sullivan & Cromwell BigLaw refugee who went on to become a psychotherapist.

It is fair to say that both Freeman and Meyerhofer have many helpful thoughts on the subject of staying in a relationship with a lawyer.
Insight into the Lawyer World

First, let’s start by offering some insight for the non-lawyers into the lawyer world. When I asked Freeman what nonlawyers should understand about their lawyer-spouse’s world, she said:

One of the most prominent stressors I’ve noticed is that my husband constantly has people upset with him. There seems to be very little reward in the daily grind. He or she has clients who are hurting and confused, and they look to Brian to magically solve their ailments. Understandably, they are upset when he cannot fix their problems, or it takes a long time to fix their problems. Then, in court, he has opposing counsel and judges who seem to be upset with him (there probably isn’t anything personal there, but the nature of the courtroom is adversarial). So all day long, he deals with people being upset with him. It is like a glorified customer service representative position, which takes its toll on my husband.

Every lawyer can relate to this. Most clients do not visit lawyers to share happy news. Inevitably, they come to us with a problem, and the client wants the lawyer to make it go away. Often, the cases we are working on have a lot at stake. This pressure is extremely stressful because so much of what we are expected to do is completely out of our control. A lawyer can prepare day and night, work around the clock, try his or her absolute best, and still lose. But lawyers are expected to deliver a win regardless of the lack of control a lawyer has over opposing counsel, her client, the judge, and the jury.

Attorney Emilie Fairbanks explains it this way:

We work all the time. We think about work all the time. We are not good at being wrong. We are sore losers. We tend to be verbal and take up all the air in the room. We live in a world measured by winning and losing which colors your view of the rest of your life. We problem solve when empathy is needed. Many of us are secret introverts, protecting our precious alone time after days of fighting, just when our partners want our attention.

Lawyers, Know Yourself!As a lawyer, you can take control of the stress and anxiety instead of letting it bleed into your relationships. One way you can do this is through mindfulness. The only way you are going to know your work life is having a negative impact on your love life is by having awareness. Awareness can only be gained by carefully paying attention to each moment. Moreover, in addition to awareness, we also need to practice acceptance.

Freeman explains:

When we stop trying to get rid of the stress (we stop fighting it; we stop hating and resenting it), and we simply accept that stress is there, and it’s not going anywhere anytime soon — that’s when we notice a reduction in the subjective experience of stress … It’s a paradox. Hate the stress = very stressed. Accept the stress = less stressed.
In other words, when you are feeling stressed, work on acknowledging and accepting rather than judging the experience. Acceptance and commitment therapy is an excellent type of therapy for this issue.

Meyerhofer also suggests you begin by becoming aware of the problem and approaching others with kindness. This awareness is the cornerstone of mindfulness practice. When you are in hyperdrive due to the stress from work — preparing for a trial, coming up for partnership, or facing deadlines — you can gently bring awareness and attention to your emotions.
Tips for the Non-Lawyer in Supporting a Lawyer

As the non-lawyer in the relationship, what can you do to help or support the lawyer you love?
Learn Empathy and Compassion
Like any relationship, empathy and compassion are key. Empathy is the ability to share and understand someone else’s emotions. Compassion is the ability to see the suffering of others together with the natural desire to help. Truly, one of the best gifts we can offer to our loved ones — and to any human being — is compassion and empathy. Freeman practices compassion and empathy by asking herself how she would feel in her husband’s shoes after arguing with people all day.
Recognize the Challenges

Meyerhofer says that lawyers can be very needy. They often come home emotionally drained from a long day at the office. Of course, even as a non-lawyer, you may also have had a terrible day. Both you and your lawyer partner should recognize the difficulties of each other’s work. A lawyer will often see his or her job as the hardest job in the whole world. Remind your partner that your work can be difficult and time-consuming too.
Be Supportive

Meyerhofer also says that lawyers will often suffer from mild forms of depression, which shows in the lack of appropriate emotional response. For example, when the partner at the firm says “this work is terrible, you aren’t even trying” after the lawyer pulled several all-nighters to do something that she has never done before or given appropriate guidance on, an appropriate response should be anger. However, lawyers will instead internalize these negative criticisms.

Again, it requires awareness to notice that your partner is overly harsh with himself. That he or she is holding themselves up to an impossibly high standard that no one can meet. Lawyers are often expected to be perfect and expect the same from themselves. But mistakes will and do happen. When mistakes do happen, be compassionate. Recognize that your partner is in pain and simply be there for him or her.

Finally, Meyerhofer suggests celebrating victories. Lawyers are often motivated by the stick rather than the carrot. When the lawyer lands that big client or finally gets the mergers and acquisition deal completed, give them a carrot and celebrate these wins. Tell him or her she did a great job. Offer genuine words of praise and support.
Self-Care is Your Responsibility

Of course, empathy and compassion must be mutual. You can only care for others as well as you are able to care for yourself. Which brings me to the next important topic: self-care.

Self-care is the mindset that we can only care for others if we care for ourselves. As is repeated on every airline safety video: Secure your own oxygen mask before assisting others.

Examples of self-care include exercise, mindfulness, proper sleep, nutrition, andvacations. Another key component to self-care is setting boundaries between your work and family responsibilities. Self-care doesn’t need to be extravagant or expensive. Treating yourself to small things that bring you pleasure such as reading a great book, going for a walk, or spending time in nature can make a huge difference.

Here’s how Freeman practices self-care:
I learned the hard way that during a busy day with multiple appointments, I must schedule a few minutes of time to myself every hour — a bathroom break, a walk around the building, 5 minutes to close my office door and not be disturbed, etc. Without those small breaks, my day doesn’t go well. Self-care can be big-scale like a vacation, or it can be small like taking a bathroom break.
It’s important to remember that self-care is something you can only do for yourself.You can certainly encourage each other by doing things as a couple that nourishes each of you. However, you can’t force your partner to exercise, eat right, or get enough sleep.
How to Engage in Conflict with a Lawyer

Many lawyers live in a world of constant conflict; therefore, it’s entirely possible that your lawyer partner is much more skilled at fighting than you are. However, the biggest difference is that at the office, lawyers fight on behalf of his or her clients so that they win. But in romantic relationships, “winning” the fight probably harms the relationship. While it may give the winner a temporary satisfaction, it will likely foster resentment and eventually escalate the conflict.

Freeman emphasises the need to be able to express emotions safely:

With couples, it’s essential for each person to be aware of and [be] able to express his/her own emotions in a safe and non-harmful way. Then, each person must hear the other’s perspective and show compassion for it.

Related to the idea of expressing emotions in a safe and non-harmful way, Meyerhofer adds what he calls “illegal remarks.” As a therapist, he is never supposed to tell someone what he or she is thinking. Similarly, don’t assume you know what your partner is thinking.

Meyerhofer recalls a partner at law firm saying things like “you’re not even trying” or “did you put any thought into this?” These are illegal remarks because the partner is assuming he knows how much effort or thought Meyerhofer put into his work. Of course, no one but Meyerhofer could know that. A more appropriate comment might be, “This work doesn’t meet my standard.”

Your thoughts are a very private place. No one can tell you what you are thinking or feeling. When you are engaged in conflict, be mindful of “illegal” remarks and don’t try to read your partner’s mind.
The Neediness of the Law

I recall a partner at a law firm telling me that the law is a very possessive mistress; I tend to agree. Most lawyers work too much.

There is no easy solution to this because lawyers earn a living by selling their time. When the goal is to maximize profit, it requires the lawyer to work as many hours as humanly possible.

Freeman offers this practical advice:
1. Take time each weekend to look at your calendars for the week.
2. Keep each other in the loop about how busy the week looks. This helps to set and adjust expectations.
3. Plan couple and family times each week even if it’s short and simple.
4. Make your relationship, marriage, and family a priority

Our careers are fulfilling and financially important, but we are replaceable at work. We’re not replaceable at home. So we take the time to plan when we can spend time with each other. It’s about priorities.

At the end of the day, if there are difficulties in your relationships and approach them with curiosity and gentleness. Also, recognize your own difficulty in being in the relationship. When things get tough, it is helpful to remind yourself that this difficult moment will pass.

Featured image: “ Close-up Of Wooden Gavel And Red Heart On Table ” from Shutterstock

IT WILL COME TO PASS---I like the way the author ended the article with a reminder that no difficult situation which lasts forever therefore people could find rest in the hope that every tomorrow will be a better day. As mentioned above, we are exposed to a battlefield of rights and obligations but I could not use it to justify an attitude of being often at odds when engaged in conversations.

I endeavor to live out all the christian values I know which make no distinction with respect to profession. Whatever that shows kindness, respect, compassion, mercy and love--- that I'll extend to others :-) I'm never in favor of waging war in relationships and as we think less of ourselves then we do not really need extra attention from our partners. When I was still in school, I never desired to be in a relationship because I know that I have no time for it but now that I am working :-)-----> I guess I'm ready for it. 

TIME, I gave up my teaching load to have time for myself, friends and family. Compared to last year where I spend my weekends checking papers, since last November, I am able to go home almost everyday. On Wednesdays, I attend the midweek service of Victory then on Thursdays/Staurdays is badminton rush.  

FOR THE LAST 8 Weekends, the review ate all of it that is why I've been quite consumed.

Good morning :-)

After reading my notes on Land Management, my world closed in where sleeping seems to be the answer.  Waking after 7 hours is already ideal but my head was still heavy and so I opted for an extension. My bad, I contemplated skipping office today to pamper my lazy mode. On the rescue, I heard Him say-- shake it off, climb out of bed now, let us talk, say hello to everyone, eat and take a bath.

I gathered my stuff and went with my parents to downtown. At the office, I took some time to get dressed then I go off for another ride bound to F Bldg. While calmly alighting the tricycle, I saw a familiar stature who was caught up on a phone conversation. Taking a few steps, another thing caught my eye, the driver wore a white jacket--- I waved for acknowledgment but I am not sure if it was obvious that I did it. On my way on the stairs, we caught up each other and I heard "GOOD MORNING" --- "good morning" I replied.

Now, I am fully awaken hahaha

Happy Tuesday to all--- Indeed, God is good :-)

Proverbs 6

:10 A little sleep, a little slumber,

A little folding of the hands to sleep—

:

11 So shall your poverty come on you like a prowler,

And your need like an armed man.

What He has in stored for us requires vigor :-)

Getting Inside the Role by HS

APRIL 7, 2015

Your attitude should be the same as that of Jesus Christ. Philippians 2:5

No actor or actress can successfully play the part of another individual without finding out who that person really is, getting into their skin, thinking as the other thought—not simply having a make-up artist turn the actor into a look-alike. When Mel Gibson asked Jim Caviezel to play the role of Jesus Christ in his film, The Passion of the Christ, Jim knew who Jesus was. He had been raised as a Roman Catholic and along with his four siblings, he went to mass on Sunday. But he didn’t really know Him.

Watching Billy Graham on television as a teenager was also a pivotal moment in his life, so he reflects, but it was playing the role of Jesus in the film that forever changed his life. In the process, he discovered who Jesus really is. It wasn’t learning Aramaic, or getting struck by lightning with no adverse effects, or the hardship and suffering that he endured playing the part. It was painfully coming to a deeper understanding of who Jesus Christ is and why it was necessary for Him to die.

Though you may have never considered this, that kind of understanding was exactly what Paul said every child of God should have. In his letter to the believers in the city of Philippi, Paul wrote, “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 2:5 NKJV). Another version put it, “Your attitude should be the same as that of Jesus Christ.”

Your life—and I am confident that Jim Caviezel would tell you the same thing—will be affected five ways.

1. Your perspective will be different.

Jesus saw the end from the beginning, while our vision is so limited. Jesus’ perspective was different because He knew God had the power to raise Him up from death. He said confidently, “No one takes it [my life] from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have authority to lay it down and authority to take it up again. This command I received from my Father” (John 10:18). He was in control—not the Romans or the Jews who sought His death.
Your attitude will be different. Focus on just one area of attitude—worry versus trust. Did Jesus worry about what was on the horizon? Not in the least. He set His face like a flint and walked to Jerusalem with head high.

2. Your values will be different. 

Your time would be spent differently. Your relationships would take on new importance, and your money would be spent differently. The reality is that five minutes after you die, your car will be meaningless, the size of your home unimportant, the amount of money you have left in your bank account inconsequential. What you have invested for God and eternity, though, will take on immediate importance.

3. Your boundaries will be different as well. 

I’ve been reading of the history of Ireland, a beautiful country that has been so torn by religious strife and prejudice. How we have faithfully held on to our beliefs (better described as prejudices) pales in light of how we have been treated by our neighbor. Our boundaries, our prejudices, our attitudes of racial superiority will melt and fade away when we gain the mind of Jesus.

4. Finally, your thinking will be different. 

Jesus looked at life from an entirely different perspective, and, according to what he has told reporters, Jim Caviezel will play roles differently in the future—to the great dismay of directors who don’t like the new and different Jim Caviezel as much as the pre-Passion one.

The bottom line is that when you begin to think as Jesus did, you will be a different person. It’s just that simple.

Resource reading: Philippians 2:1-11.

WP

Look who is home?  wacky ang natural sa kanya kaya pakisamahan ko nalang hahaha

It is lolo Ilde's birthday that is why he has come to visit. (the boys in the family)

 Cyclops ako tita :-) cute! pwedeng FB profile pic

Pikit Mr. Gilagid

Tapos dilat effect ako tita

Ito na ata ang pinakpormal nyang itsura hehe

Di pwede walang kiss hehe

PEMS: Re-commitment to the Lord's calling

unang beses kong matulog sa duyan overnight, next time bibili ako ng duyan na mi mosquito net

dahil nakatulog naman ng maayos, maagang nagising para salubungin ang sunrise

kagabi naligo yung iba kaya heto si San-san nalang natirans kasama ko kanina habang ang iba ay abala sa paglalaro

I'll find time later to discuss what were the significant things we did on this occasion.